the benefits of gratitude
The benefits of gratitude are numerous. Read on to learn how gratitude can change your entire outlook on situations, experiences, and life in general.
So often people complain about things in their life. They say things like “I hate my job”, “Why did I get involved with him/her in the first place?” “I’ll never get over that bad experience” (or whatever it might be). Whenever we focus our attention on any experience or situation that we don’t like, it only makes us feel worse. Admittedly, it’s tough to focus on something else when you’re right in the middle of some challenging or unpleasant situation. However, its only by changing our point of view that we are able to escape its negative effects.
One of my favorite tools for helping someone alter their viewpoint and escape from the effects of a challenging experience, is called Reframing. I’d like to share with you a personal experience that exemplified reframing very well. Back in the 90’s there was a TV show on PBS called “The Joy of Painting, with Bob Ross”. Bob could create an amazingly beautiful painting in only about 20 minutes. I really enjoyed his shows and decided to give it a try for myself. It took some practice to learn, but eventually I got the hang of it and made some pretty nice paintings.
THE 2-COLOR EXPERIMENT
One day I was curious to see if I could do a painting by using only 2 colors. I chose Brown and Indian Yellow. I painted a picture of an old, abandoned cabin and a broken-down, horse-drawn wagon. Finally, I put some trees and shrubs in to fill up the spaces, along with some birds in the sky in the background. When it was finished, I thought it was okay, but nothing to get excited about.
Fast forward about 10 years. A neighbor lady stopped in one day – don’t remember why. I had a few of my favorite paintings on my walls, and a stack of other paintings that I wasn’t really crazy about. As she flipped through those paintings, she stopped on my 2-color painting. Much to my surprise, she loved it! So, I just gave it to her. Afterall, I was never impressed with it. It’s important to note here that I had never framed the painting, I just didn’t think it was worth it. But she liked it and said she’d get a frame for it.
the benefits of gratitude
A few months later, I went to her house to see how it looked. She had several beautiful paintings by real artists in her house – I was impressed with how good they were. Then, I couldn’t believe my eyes! Right there, prominently displayed alongside those professionally produced paintings, was MY painting with an immaculate frame around it. I was absolutely blown away! It was powerful, vibrant, alive, and just as good as all the other paintings! Laughingly I told her that “if I knew it was that good… I would have kept it!” She laughed.
My point here is that the frame can change everything inside it. And this is one of the ways I help people – by teaching them to look at their problems from a different angle or perspective. Dr. Wayne Dyer said, “When you change the way you look at something, the thing you’re looking at changes”. This is so true. A new frame made my “so-so” painting look incredibly good, and a different perspective can change how we feel about virtually any problem or situation. We are so quick to judge things as being either good or bad. But these are only judgements. What’s good to one person may be considered bad to another person. It’s really just a matter of personal perspective… a different frame.
TOUGH TIMES FORCE GROWTH
In my own life I’ve experienced some pretty heavy things. But it was exactly those heavy things that taught me to look at things from a higher perspective. One question I often ask my clients is “In what way(s) are you a better person because you had that experience?” It’s the tough experiences in life that make us grow, and teach us wisdom. Those who refuse to grow – always end up being bitter, angry, resentful, pessimistic, or just plain miserable. The hard knocks of life have taught me to develop an “attitude of gratitude”.
It was the tough times that helped (or sometimes forced) me to grow – much more than the easy times. Looking back, I appreciate those “tough” times, and I’m grateful for them. I wouldn’t want to go through them again, but I appreciate them none the less. And I’m grateful because it was the tough times that made me who I am today… and I like me!
Life is like the yin/yang symbol above. In every situation, there’s an up-side and a down-side. Nothing is 100% good or 100% bad. It’s all a matter of perspective. Taking the higher perspective (reframing) allows us to see the big picture which helps us to see both sides of the story, and much more. So often we let our pride and ego lock us into a less-than-satisfying point of view, belief, or situation. Many people are either stuck in the past over some experience, or living in fear of what the future might bring.
the benefits of gratitude
Developing an attitude of gratitude can reframe your world! Be thankful for the wisdom you learned from the tough times; they served a positive purpose. And realize, that if you could make it through those tough times, you can handle anything that comes to you in the future.
If you can see this page well enough to read it, be grateful for your eyesight! If your eyesight is such that you can’t read it, be grateful for all the years you did have good eyesight. At least you have the good memories of being able to see well. Some people are born blind – but that doesn’t prevent them from developing their other senses to compensate for it. Besides that, they don’t miss what they never had. There is always something to be grateful for.
YOUR THOUGHTS AFFECT YOUR BODY
Gratitude is so powerful that it affects our biology, physiology and overall health. Being grateful actually has a positive effect on our respiration and heartrate by slowing them down and lowering our blood pressure. It also reduces stress and anxiety levels. Lower stress levels boost our immune system and enhance our body’s healing capabilities. An attitude of gratitude enhances our cognitive abilities, allowing us to think more clearly. It may not always be easy to be grateful, but trust me… finding the upside is well worth the effort.
Here’s a very easy way to start developing your gratitude levels: Every day, write down 3 things you’re grateful for. You can write more, but start with just 3. Read through your list every day, and avoid repeats, no duplicate words. Do this every day for 14 days to start with. You’ll be surprised at how many things you can think of! Soon… very soon, you will build a new frame around your world, and view your life from an entirely different perspective. Give it a shot. Develop your own Attitude of Gratitude. I’m even grateful for my ability to write this post, and for those who choose to read it!